The key to a good result in the IELTS Writing Task 1 is:
Write a structure which has 3 parts: introduction, overview (key features) and details (data).
Write sentence structures that include subordinate clauses.
Connect the sentences logically.
When writing the sentences for the details part of the essay you should make sure you use this type of sentence design:
Connective + time + description + data
The order these can be rearranged to vary the sentence structures. Here is an example:
It can be seen in the graph that from 2002 to 2004 the consumption of red meat remained constant at 1500 g/week.
This follows the pattern: Connective + time + description + data
However, the sentence could have been written this way:
In detail, the consumption of red meat, which stood at 1500 g/week in 2002, remained constant until the end of the period in 2004.
This follows the pattern: Connective + data + time + description +time
Candidates who fail to write the details section of the Task 1 without the ‘time’ and ‘data’ (or whatever the axes of the graph are labeled in) are destined to get Band 5 for Task achievement according to the Public Band Descriptors which say:
Band 5: “there may be no data to support the description”
Here are some very simple sentences that describe the graph above in the format required in the IELTS exam:
The graph gives information about the consumption of red meat between 2002 and 2010.
A better sentence would be this:
The graph gives information about the amount of red meat which as consumed over the period between 2002 and 2010.
(Why is this a better sentence?)
Overall, the consumption of red meat tumbled over the period shown.
Here is a better sentence that says the same:
Overall, although consumption of red meat was relatively stable at both the start and end of the period, it tumbled dramatically between 2004 and 2008.
(Why is this a better sentence?)
In detail, red meat consumption began at 1500 g/week in 2002. Consumption stayed constant at 1500 g/week until 2004. From 2004 to 2008, consumption of red meat went into free-fall, declining 60% to reach just 300 g/week. Consumption levelled out at 300 g/week for the remainder of the period.
While all of these sentences are grammatically correct there is NO LINKING between them, ALMOST NO COMPLEX STRUCTURES and NO EXAMPLES OF REFERENCE (where a word like “this” or “it” is used to refer to something talked about earlier).
Here is another attempt:
In detail, although red meat consumption, which began at 1500 g/week in 2002, stayed constant at this level until 2004, it plunged dramatically after this time, falling continuously over the next 4 years to 300 g/week by 2008. This represented a substantial decline of 60%, in relative terms. Consumption subsequently levelled out and remained constant at 300 g/week for the remainder of the period.
(Why is this better than the first attempt?)
Notice the use of the subordinate clause structure with “although”:
In detail, although red meat consumption, which began at 1500 g/week in 2002, stayed constant at this level until 2004, it plunged dramatically after this time, falling continuously over the next 4 years to 300 g/week by 2008.
It is very important that candidates understand that subordinators like: “although”, “even though”, “while”, “whereas” and all other subordinators require two clauses. The sentence pattern is:
[subordinator] + clause , clause
Although sales began at 200 cars per month in 2000, they soared spectacularly to over 1000 per month by 2010.
We could also write:
Sales began at 200 cars per month in 2000 although they soared spectacularly to over 1000 per month by 2010.
Here the pattern is:
clause + [subordinator] + clause
Candidates should note that linguistic research shows that this is a higher level sentence structure that is not used by lower level English learners!